How you Gonna Cook Crack When You Can't Even Cook Breakfast

Fetty What?

I download the US and UK Top 100 every now and then to find out what will be playing on Australian stations in six months. It’s an interesting study to compare both countries but it’s fair to say the US is country heavy, but it never makes the top 30, and the UK is dance floor heavy.

What I don’t get is this man called Fetty Wap. He dominated the top 20 in October and I’ve barely heard of him.

Drake, Kanye, Selena, love you. Know you. Justin and Taylor yes you’re OK. Wouldn't kick you out of bed but not overly keen.

The Weeknd, knew you’d be massive since your first hit. Love.

Fetty “how you gonna cook crack when you can't even cook breakfast” - where did you come from? And where did you get your name? And why do you and your Remy boys spend so much time in your songs cooking pies and crack? It's very interesting and makes for good music.

According to the internet, young Willie Maxwell was born in 1991, grew up in surburban New Jersey and decided to become a rapper and call himself Fetty, which means money. So far, so normal.

I like him. He sounds like a mix between Drake, Kanye and Jeremih. I love the originality of his beats.

He’s been cosigned by Kanye and is a rapidly  rising star.

He is sure to win either Best New Artist or Favorite Rap/Hip-Hop Artist at the American Music Awards. I’d go for both.

H&M Opens New Flagship City Store in Sydney

H&M bag behind smug child

While I was not as excited about this event as Stefan Lutz who woke up at 4am to be there at the opening, I was pleased to see another great large clothing empire spreading in Australia, adding to the Zara and Topshop Sydney city retail joy.

While discount fashion outlet H&M have been in both Melbourne and Sydney’s Macquarie shopping centres, most Sydney siders had little experience with the label until this week.

I went three times in the first opening week and was very impressed.

Three levels, well-staffed and organised, homewares and plenty of joy for women who love to shop. I was surprised to see everything you could wish for, basics, evening wear, underwear, swimwear, gym wear, men’s and kids all well represented. 

I bought a cute pleated evening dress for $40, a transparent wrap white work blouse for $30 and a beach dress for $15. But when I hit the kids wear I went a little crazy as they had $2.95 opening specials on $20 boys knitted tops and girl’s tops. I bought about 10 of each in all sizes.

Kids wear is fabulous with cute knickers and basics all around $10, adorable swimsuits in pirate and flower designs and plenty of gorgeous babywear all made of organic cotton with an under $10 price point.

I also lost it in the homewares department seeing the pink stripey rugs and manchester. I adore pink stripes and can’t get enough.

Target Australia is going to suffer as everything in H&M is better, well made and cheaper. While you can occasionally find a decent dress at Target , it is generally over $40, but everything at H&M is cheaper and more stylish. 

Mums are going to love H&M with softer price openings compared to Zara and better overall selection.

The only problem is the fitting room queues are out the door and there could be even more staff at checkouts as every line at all six checkout sections were ten deep.

I’m loving this summer already!
 

Friendship with Ryan R VS $400,000

Ryan R is upset his old friend shopped pics of new baby, a girl called... James...and broke up with the lifelong friend.

Sad, but given the choice between a continued friendship with a man who is dull, consistently unfunny, and calls his baby daughter James, or $400,000, I know which one I'd choose.

Even Scar Jo left him. I'd certainly be emulating her actions.

Baking is Not Dead: 3 simple ways to make Your Cake Rule

You can have your cake and eat it!

I always considered myself a good cook and a great baker. It's easy to mix a cake and bang in it the oven and I was motivated from an early age by the lure of sugary treats.

But recently I have discovered three basic tricks which help you create a most, moist superior cake. These tips are simple and take your cake from good to great.

Mothers Prayer for her Daughter

Already the mother of Alice and Penelope, motherhood is very much on the comedienne's mind. So now we bring you this excerpt from Tina Fey's book, Bossypants:

First, Lord: No tattoos. May neither Chinese symbol for truth nor Winnie-the-Pooh holding the FSU logo stain her tender haunches.

May she be Beautiful but not Damaged, for it's the Damage that draws the creepy soccer coach's eye, not the the Beauty.

Opening Up

A lot of people have a lot of questions about open marriage.

In order to avoid going into too much mind numbing detail, I will offer a simple analogy.

Bad behaviour and lolly bags

3D lolly bag before the unfortunate indicent

This weekend I left the lolly bag on the car roof as I strapped my daughter into her seat after a four year old party.

Every time I place something on the roof I simultaneously warn myself I'm going to forget it. Then I do. The petrol cap, a porcelain plate and cake, lunchboxes and children's clothing have all come the raw prawn these past few months.

Last week I left the remote control of a fantastic toy car on the roof, losing both the device and the car's purpose. It didn't even belong to me, I had borrowed it from my mum.